DOCUMENT     'THE BALLAD OF THE  TYRANNICAL HUSBAND' [1] Note this is not the original title for this verse. Translated by P.J.P.Goldberg.

God protect all women that are in this town,
Including maidens, widows, and wives,
For they are much blamed and sometimes wrongly,
I take witness of the people who hear this song.

Listen, good sirs, both young and old,
This tale shall be told by a good husband;
He wedded a woman who was fair and bold,
And they had enough to do as they wanted.

She was a good housewife, courteous and homely,
And he was an angry man and easily vexed,
Chiding and brawling, and behaving like a fiend,
Like those who frequently fall out with their best friend,

Until one day it came about, to keep my story brief,
The goodman wanted to go ploughing; so he took his horse,
He called forth his oxen, the white and the black,
And he said, 'Dame, [2] for God's sake, get dinner ready on time'.

The goodman and his lad have gone to the plough;
The goodwife had much to do, but she has no servant,
Many small children to look after, not just herself alone,
She did more than she could inside her own house.

Home came the goodman later in the day
To check that everything was to his satisfaction.
'Dame' he said, 'is our dinner ready?' 'Sir,' she said, 'no.
How would you have me get done more than I am able?'

Then he began to chide and said, 'Damn you!
I would that you should go all day to plough with me,
To walk in the clods that are wet and boggy,
The you would know what it is to be a ploughman.'

The goodwife then swore, and this is what she said,
'I have more to do than I possibly can;
If you were to follow me for an entire day,
You would be weary of your task, I'll wager my head.'

'Blast! In the devil's name!' said the goodman,
'What do you have to do, but sit here at home?
You go to your neighbours' house, one after the other,
And sit there chatting [3] with Jack and with Joan.'

Then the goowife says, 'May you rot!
I've got more to do, if everything were know;
When I lie in my bed, I only get a little sleep,
Yet first early in the morning you will call me to get up.

'After I have lain awake all night with our child,
I get up in the morning and find our house chaotic.
I milk the cows and turn them out in the field,
While you are quite sound asleep, Christ protect me!'

Then later on in the day I make butter.
Afterwards I make cheese. These you think a joke.
Then our children start crying and must be got up,
Yet you will blame me if any of our goods are not there.

When I have done this, there is still even more to do:
I feed our chickens otherwise they will be scrawny;
Our hens, our capons and our ducks all together,
I also tend to our goslings that go on the green.

I bake, I brew, otherwise it will not be well;
I beat and swingle flax, so help me God,
I heckle the tow, I warm up and cool down, [4]
I tease wool and card it and spin it on the wheel.

'Dame,' said the goodman, 'the devil have your bones!
You do not have to bake or brew more than once a fortnight.
I can't see what good you do within this big house,
But you are always excusing yourself with grunts and groans.'

'Either I make a piece of linene and woollen cloth once a year,
So as to clothe ourselves and our children in together,
Or we go to the market and buy it at great expense;
Every year I am as busy as I possibly can be.

When I have done this, I look at the sun. [5]
I get the food ready for our beast before you come home,
And food for ourselves before it is noon,
Yet I don't get a fair word when I have done.

So I look to our welfare both outdoors and inside,
So nothing great or small is lacking.
I take care to please you, lest any strife arises,
And therefore I think you do wrong to tell me off.'

Then the goodman says angrily,
'A good housewife would do all this long before it were prime, [6]
And because half of what we have is yours
You must work for your part as I do for mine.'

Therefore, dame, I warn you, get yourself ready promptly;
Tomorrow with my lad to the plough you shall go,
And I will be the housewife and stay at home to look after the house,
And take my ease as you have done, by God and St John!'

'I go along with that,' said the goodwife, 'as I understand,
Tomorrow in the morning I worn out,
Yet I will rise whilst you are sleeping,
And see that everything is ready for you.

So on the next day at daylight,
The goodwife remembered her task and got up right away.
'Dame,' said the goodman, 'I swear by God's might!
I will bring home our beasts, and help with what you have to do.'

The goodman goes quickly to the field;
The goodwife makes the butter secretly.
She again takes the butter milk and puts it in the churn,
And says, 'One pint will be enough for my husband to learn with.'

The goodman comes home and takes heed
How the wife had laid the meat to soak. [7]
She says, 'Sir, the whole of this day you must not sleep,
Look after our children and don't let them cry.

If you go to the kiln to make malt,
Place a small fire underneath, sir, for God's sake.
The kiln is low and dry; you have to tend it well.
Unless it establishes a fire, it will be difficult to brown nicely.
 

'Here two geese are sat; take good care of them,
So that they may come to good, otherwise there will be trouble.'
'Dame', said the goodman, 'you go off to the plough,
Teach me no more housewifery, for I know enough.'

The goodwife goes off, courteous and capable,
She calls to her lad, and to the plough they go.
They are busy all day; I have a story about this,
And when I have a drink, you'll have the best of it. [8]

[1] The text exists in a single later fifteenth-century London merchant's book which is itself made up of a number of different texts. The text itself is corrupt, but it should not be supposed that because it is found in only one manuscript that it enjoyed little popularity. That it is verse using a rather ploddng rhyme scheme implies that the verse was intended to be memorised and to be transmitted orally. The poem itself has an imaginary narrator declaring the verse narrative to his audience. The text is, of course, designed to be humerous, but in the context of this London manuscript, it may be that peasants as a whole were being derided. Again it does not follow that this would have been the only context in which this text circulated. Return.

[2] The formal mode of address of husband to wife, just as 'sir' is the address used by wives to husbands. The term is not related to social status. Return.

[3] The original text says 'janglynge'. This relates to a common misogynistic notion that women were 'naturally' garrulous and represents a pejorative or insulting usage. Return.

[4] These represent processes in the making of linen from raw flax. Flax was often grown in gardens adjoining the peasant dwelling specifically to be worked into linen. Return.

[5] I.e. to tell the time from its position in the sky. Return.

[6] Prime represents the first part of the day, that is early morning. Return.

[7] Presumably salt meat is being consumed, hence the need for soaking. Fresh meat would represent a comparatively expensive commodity. Return.

[8] The story that follows does not survive here, but it was presumably part of an extant tradion whereby the wife succeeds in her ploughing, but the husband fails miserably at his 'houewifely' tasks. Return.

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